The Balanced Life, Huntsville Alabama

Naughty or Nice? Exploring Realistic Discipline for Parent

Contributed by: Jessica D. Cleveland, M.S., LPC, NCC

It’s that time of year when we talk to our kids a lot about their behavior. We sing the song “You better not pout, you better not cry, because Santa Clause is coming to town, he’s making a list and checking it twice, he’s going to find out whose naughty and nice,” but how often do we encourage good behavior in our children other times during the year.

When a marriage breaks up, it causes heartache and broken dreams for at least one of the spouses, usually the one (or both) who is hurt. Marriages that end in divorce are complicated and end for many different reasons.

Lily enters the house after school, darts upstairs, and slams her bedroom door before you can even get “how was your day” remotely out of your mouth. Ever since she turned 15, it’s like you two are worlds apart.

Growing up one of my father’s favorite sayings was “Pain/disappointment/discomfort builds character and/or humility”. A little background. My father grew up in extreme poverty, served, active duty, in the military for 24 years, and has had a series of health issue resulting from his service in the military, so the man knows a thing or two about discomfort. Uncomfortable situations, failure, and disappointment are all facts of life we will experience. However, what separates the men from the boys and the women from the girls is how we deal and adjust to things going wrong.

It’s that transitional time of the year again when summer break is officially winding down and there are less than two weeks before most schools start back.  For parents, it is sometimes a relief for their kids to go back to school, but for children and adolescents, it can be a feeling of dread to get back into the routine of schoolwork and waking up early. 

On a weekly basis, I meet with parents who struggle to discipline their children effectively. In some cases, they are searching for a diagnosis to explain their child’s inappropriate behavior and in others, they are desperately looking for a way to control their child. While the symptoms of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Oppositional Defiant Disorder and related disorders can present themselves with negative behaviors, there are some ways to combat these. Parents can modify their children’s behavior with some easy principles and by using one word: CONSISTENCY.

Every week I meet with parents who struggle to discipline their children effectively.  In some cases, they are searching for a diagnosis to explain their child’s inappropriate behavior and in others, they are desperately looking for a way to better parent their child.

As we embark on the New Year, we also enter into a new decade. For some, this has no significance at all, but for others there is extra motivation to make positive changes—especially those who are raising kids in this new decade.

As we conclude this years Mother’s Day, I have found myself feeling many different ways regarding this special time of the year.

As a mother and father of young children my husband and I often ponder the questions: How will our children remember us when we’re gone? What will they take with them that helps them become successful in this life? How do we build meaningful relationships with them now that last, thus leaving them with a legacy that impacts their life and the lives of others in a positive way?

As a mother and father of young children my husband and I often ponder the questions: How will our children remember us when we’re gone? What will they take with them that helps them become successful in this life? How do we build meaningful relationships with them now that last, thus leaving them with a legacy that impacts their life and the lives of others in a positive way?

As a mother and father of young children my husband and I often ponder the questions? How will our children remember us when we’re gone? What will they take with them that helps them become successful in this life? How do we build meaningful relationships with them now that last, thus leaving them with a legacy that impacts their life and the lives of others in a positive way?

This week is a BIG week at my house. And by BIG, I mean, BIG….our daughter becomes…drum roll please…a TEEN-AGER!

Happy Labor Day all! Being a parent is a true labor of love, heavy on the labor and the love.

I recently attended a leadership training conference where one of the speakers made the statement, “Close minded Leaders, Close Minds.”

Most of us, at different times in our life, have struggled with self-esteem issues. The definition of self-esteem is a concept that is extremely subjective, but is vital in our development as a person.  Starting from a young age, we are strongly influenced by others, whether intentionally or unintentionally. As I was doing research the past few weeks for an upcoming event at a local school, I studied some of the facts of bullying and how it can shape children’s self-esteem.  I found that nearly 1 out of 4 children are bullied at their school and these bullying victims are at an increased risk for depression, anxiety, sleep difficulties, and poor school adjustment.  I also found that youth victimized by their peers were 2.4 times more likely to report suicidal ideation and 3.3 times more likely to report a suicide attempt than youth who reported not being bullied.

It’s that transitional time of the year again when summer break is officially winding down and there are less than two weeks before most schools start back.

Simplify the Holidays

Contributed by Wendy Carlton

The holiday season is officially in full swing. While these months full of holiday spirit can be merry and bright, the holidays can be stressful and overwhelming. There are checklists of things to do and places to see -- light displays, Santa, Elf on the Shelf, and cookie swaps. Sometimes these “helpful resources” can feel like a frequent reminder of all of the things that you aren’t doing for your children and family. Every year gets a little busier, and possibly a little Pinterest-ier...

“I’m worried about my kid and don’t know how to help them” is a statement I hear often in my office. Concerned parents bring their teens in for counseling because they’ve noticed behavioral changes and know their child is hurting, but often feel lost in how to help them.