The Balanced Life, Huntsville Alabama

To be honest I had a different subject in mind for this week’s blog, but as life always does, things changed and this topic hit home to me. 

Many people, including myself, fear failure.  The thought of putting your mind, time, and energy towards a goal and then it not work out as planned can wreak havoc on someone’s mental and emotional state.  I think what we forget is that taking chances also means there is a risk for failure.  What I have learned through various experiences is that it is what we do in the face of that perceived failure that makes all of the difference.

Life is about choices.  So when we are confronted with a situation that results in what we perceive as failure we can: give up and give into that perception or take the learning experience and push forward. When reading about this topic, and working to apply it to my own life, I came across a blog (www.becomingminimalist.com) and he had nine great steps to overcoming failure that I wanted to share with you all.

1. We admit that we experience it.  Despite the universality of failure, our world goes to great lengths to hide it. People always have and people always will. Our default position too often is to downplay our weaknesses, but those who find growth in failure begin by simply admitting its existence in their lives.
2. We recognize failure is common. And because we know all experience it, we find comfort knowing we are not alone in it.
3. We look for personal responsibility. Our initial tendency is often to blame others.
4. We process our weakness. Socrates once said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” This holds true in both success and failure. When failure occurs, which it always will, the wisest of us journey inward to determine the cause and intentional steps we can take to learn from the experience. And in time, we learn to champion humility.
5. We let go of the factors outside our control. One of the most hope-filled moments in life is when we find the courage to let go of what we cannot change.
6. We grow through pain.We live in a society passionately committed to avoiding pain. But there is benefit to be found in discomfort. While I would never encourage anybody to intentionally seek pain through failure, it will arise. And when it does, it will be okay. In fact, it will teach us things we could never learn elsewhere: patience and perseverance for example.
7. We forgive.  If our pain is partly a result of someone else’s failures, we find freedom in forgiveness.
8. We turn to others. Nobody successfully navigates life alone. When the hope inside us begins to fade, we look for it in others. We turn to family. If family is not available, we turn to friends. And if friends are not available, we look for intentional communities around us to find support.
9.  And then, we share our stories. It may not happen right away—some failures take longer to process than others. But eventually, we find opportunity to share our story. When we do, we share it with honesty and humility. Through it, we discover opportunity to provide hope, strength, and encouragement to others. We find influence for good. And we begin to make sense of our failings.

 Failure doesn’t mean the end, but the choice is up to you.  If you are struggling with this in your own life, we can be a part of the others you turn to.  Give us a call at 256.258.7777 or send an email to info@thebalancedlifellc.com.