The Balanced Life, Huntsville Alabama

Is the phrase “good stress” an oxymoron? Or, can a time-limited amount of stress allow us to experience growing pains and learn to be flexible, roll with resistance, and stretch our limitations into a more expanded comfort zone?

These questions swirled through my head on Friday as I wrapped my breakables in packing paper, removed my degrees and artwork from my office walls, emptied my desk drawers, boxed up my bookshelves, and scooted all of my furniture into a pile in the center of the room. Why did I feel so STRESSED? I knew full well that we were renovating, expanding, updating, and remodeling our cozy suite at The Balanced Life. I had the floor plan. I had the game plan. I had a well laid out PLAN for the next 4-6 weeks of transition. And yet, why did I feel nervous about this positive change?

Let’s get real: nobody with whom I have ever interacted has admitted to enjoying the process of packing and moving. It is not generally considered calming to place one’s life into boxes, no matter how organized, and start from scratch in a new space, a new place, a new city, or a new life. I felt consciously aware of my heightened stress levels as I rationalized to myself while packing and sorting that this was, in fact, normal to hate the physical process and upheaval of moving. But why? When we know that a change will be good, and we anticipate this change with eagerness and excitement for the future…what’s the deal with the nerves?

Any time we enter into a transitional phase, we are confronted with our current reality and forced to examine why our comfort zone has become just that: comfortable. A little known fact/personal side note about me: my heritage is Dutch. As in, my grandfather grew up in Holland, my dad was born in Curacao, and gardening is in my blood. I love plants, greenery, and flowers. Stick me in a garden, and I will happily reside there indefinitely. So, even with a pleasingly large internal office, I’ve been yearning for a window office with natural light for a year. I crave cultivation, not only of therapeutic healing, but also, greenery! As a part of our renovation at The Balanced Life, I have been offered a sunny, delightful office. Yet, I feel anticipatory apprehension about changing around my space. It’s counterintuitive, but often we experience uneasiness about the unknown, even when the unknown is likely positive.

Working with the client population with whom I do (trauma, eating disorders, and complicated bereavement are my specialties), it is not only necessary but absolutely crucial to build a safe, warm, nurturing, therapeutic space. Nobody wants to process trauma in an environment that is cold, austere, harshly lit, and stark. Since I began practicing at The Balanced Life in August 2017, I have slowly added to my space and the office has grown up around me, organically. My clients have come to trust the process, to trust the safety of the space, and to trust me. So, to change their environment is to expect and address some regression in safety and trauma processing goals. I understand and accept this. My clients also seem to understand that the change will be fantastic in the long run, and that short term discomfort will result in a wonderful lesson and reaffirmation of the power of delayed gratification. Avoidance of anxiety provoking situations only prolongs and perpetuates the anxiety. So, I find myself reassuring clients that if we address their concerns about the change, then by the time we have processed any fears or discomfort, we will have found new and positive coping skills. Using these renovations as a means to address our emotional responses to variation from the norm translates into valuable tools for handling future nerve-filled situations.

So, what is the takeaway from today’s musings? For me, it is that there is indeed such a thing as “good stress,” and how we adapt and adjust depends entirely upon how we choose to cope with change. Mindfulness, prioritization, positive affirmation, healthy cognitive awareness, and flexibility are key in adjusting to fluidly changing situations outside of our control. I am thrilled that our practice is growing, and I appreciate the opportunity to be a part of such a progressive developmental phase. My attitude towards these next several weeks/months of renovation will remain one of anticipation as my colleagues, clients, and I look forward to the changes that lie ahead.

If you find that coping with change and dealing with life stressors is a challenge for you, let us help! You can reach us at 256-258-7777 or info@thebalancedlifellc.com.