The Balanced Life, Huntsville Alabama

I often get asked how to help someone through a panic attack.  When put on the spot, my mind used to go blank even though I’ve had lots of training and have learned how to help someone during panicking. 

Because generalized anxiety disorder is the number one mental health diagnosis and most reported mental health affliction in America, not only do therapists need to understand anxiety as a whole, but how to help someone when they experience a panic attack.

What exactly is panic disorder anyway?  The Beck Institute for Cognitive Therapy defines it as: “panic disorder is characterized by seemingly untriggered, unexpected anxiety. People with panic disorder may experience a sudden upsurge of sensations, such as palpitations, sweating, trembling, shaking, shortness of breath, chest pain, nausea, dizziness, chills, and numbness.”  While anxiety is not the same as panic, the two are related.  Not everyone who experiences anxiety also experiences panic attacks.

Recently I took a call from someone who was trying to help his girlfriend through a panic attack.  They had been out shopping and with the crowds of people at every turn in the stores, it sent her into a panic and by the time they got to their car, she was having a full blown panic attack.  They were in the car and he did not know how to help her.  Together, with him coaching her while I coached him, it was quite an experience for me, too.  Since then, I have reflected on the real time efforts made at helping her.  Learning about panic attacks and experiencing them through someone else is a whole different ball game!  Processing it later provided this “how to help” list:

Make eye contact- When someone is panicking and experiencing some or all of the symptoms listed above, they can no longer think for themselves and are not present in the moment.  Instead, they have gone to a place described as an “out of body experience”.  By having them look at you, it helps keep them focused.

Grounding- Because panic attacks occur typically when a person is not in eminent danger, but the fear they experience in the moment suggests they are, grounding techniques help.  Say things like, “look at my shirt and tell me what color it is” or “name two sounds you hear right now” or “touch that cup”.  Having the person who is panicking use their 5 senses (touch, hear, smell, see, and taste) as ways to stay in the here and now helps to bring them back from the panic sensation.

Mimic your breathing- Slow down the breath by using a simple technique of 3-3-3 or 4-4-4 second breaths.  Instruct them to breathe the same as you breathe and tell them what that is.  Say, “follow my breath. Breathe in for 4 (and do it), hold for 4 (and do it), and breathe out for 4 (and do it).  Do this a couple of times and then remind them to look at you.  Repeat the grounding techniques and then return to mimic breathing.

Be patient- You may have to dig deep and learn patience when helping someone through a panic attack.  According to healthline.com, “Most panic attacks last only a few minutes — though they often feel like a lifetime when you’re experiencing one. Symptoms typically peak within 10 minutes and then begin to fade away.”  However, it may take longer for some and you may have to adjust your schedule if you are on a time sensitive schedule.

Another tip for helping someone who makes it through the panic attack is to remember it can be exhausting for both of you.  Some healthy coping skills may also help: taking a warm bath, journaling, holding one another/ hugging (when welcomed and appropriate), listening to soft music, drink hot tea or warm broth, going for a walk, snuggling with a pet.  This list is not exhaustive and should be made to fit the person’s unique needs and is a start of suggestions.  It helps to develop a list of healthy coping strategies before the high levels of anxiety or panic sets in and have the list handy.  It does the thinking for you when you or the panicked person cannot think for themselves.  As an offering of hope, remember that panic attacks do not last forever and can improve over time.  It is treatable and seeking counseling for anxiety or panic attacks can be helpful in a relatively short amount of time.  If you would like to contact us at The Balanced Life, LLC for more information or to schedule an appointment, feel free to contact Holly at holly@thebalancedlifellc.com.